Freedom?

The freedom from fear
is true freedom
to live your life
how you want
not watching your back
not holding back ideas
or hiding your thoughts
no masking your face
and walking in shadows
able to love
and care
hope
even die
how you want to

Awash

Does no one ask why?
look for a clean truth
in the murky wash water
to search through remains
to find what killed him
was it the bullet
or the lifestyle.
Looking far ahead
the light seems so dim
but the tunnel can cave in
so wash away your sickness
and look for a cure.
I didn't find it in hiding
being afraid of toys
because they break
looking around every corner
to never take a step.
So I ran into the real world
and found all my vices
to burn out
or fade away.
Instead I took the middle paths
just because it will end
doesn't it mean it wont matter
and i can't control it
lets take a shower
to get ready for a dirty day


W
when did we lose control
were we wrapped in delusions?
wild dreams spun my head
whipping up fantasies
that whistled in the air
my wonders left me
and once upon a time
was here
but we were never satisfied
as our world filled with dreams
we willingly gave it all
for what more could come
with all our wishes
finally true

eltiT

Closed Eyes

We shared so many moments
close spots in dark rooms
hands so near
but they never touched
had i only grasped life
to see where it led
maybe one of those moments
could have changed us all
for better or for worse
could have brought us something new


Asking

You ask me why I am
but all i know is who
and sometimes i lose that
but you kept wanting to know
to study me
in hopes of making me better
never thinking
that i like who i am
and each question at why
is a push farther away


Goodbye For Never?

I leave tomorrow
so i will give you this note
a promise that wherever
i might be
you will be with me
you left your mark
when we first met
like a rock thrown into a stream
my course could never be the same
as i bent with you
slicing through the ground
you showed me a course
and when you left
i will still follow it
tomorrow you step out
but you'll never leave

And we were alone

Our leaders had left us.
Their reflections sat in the water.
Lonely, looking for a friend.
With no direction to move in
We stood watching the sun disappear
Staring at each other
we stood watching the sun not move
Our leaders had walked off
and the pools of water
had caught us in time.

Not in Our Backyard

Human Figures

A Monster

I sat beneath a monster.
towering over the world
the wind bending to its will
sitting in its shade
i did not fear
scurrying around it
they did not dare look up at it
but darted beneath its legs
hoping that it wouldn't see them
the slumbering giant did not mind
as it basked in the sun.

A Leader

To bring us from this wasteland
of hate and fear
of division and confusion
to find the answer
to all our questions
a messiah
a leader
our hope for tomorrow
our hope for today
we've waited for so long
we've lost so much time
maybe one of us was him
maybe we should have led
and now we walk
and now we sing
the songs of life
the songs of beginning
I left the wasteland
because i kicked it from me

Septober

5 Seconds

1
the seconds slip
slowly beneath the water
sinking softly to the ground
2
and our ships sailed away
we lost the maps
the compass
and the sails
3
the sun set
and the day hid
as my mind wandered
4
those seconds we had
were precious to me
and i hope you
hold them dear
5
I still close my eyes
and count silently to five
to remember when our ships
bumped ways
the seconds we lost
and the lives we gained.

------------------------

Confusion Part 1(part 1 and 2 to be said together at the same time)
Take it back
Take it back
For the people who died
the beliefs that were lost
to build these cities
on this golden hill
take it back
take it back
the cracks that were left
softened by time
under stressed and pressure
tore us all down
take it back
take it back
and lets rejoice
millions have died
and we trample their bodies
millions have died
and we sleep on their bones

----------
Part 2

Give it away
give it away
the death wasn't worth it
the ideas not perfect
the streets never golden
on this shit pile
give it away
give it away
an uneasy structure
beaten by humans
who left the system
for death and decay
give it away
give it away
but i'll give it
one more chance
for the millions who will live
a house and home
for the millions unborn
a god of their own

-------------------

Explanations
I don't understand your tears
why you cried
when i spoke those words
it wasn't meant to hurt
it wasn't meant to mar
or even to reveal
a much darker side
all i wanted to do
was shine the lamp a new
with a different lens
at a different angle
for a my time
so take my illuminations
not as sadness
but as my truth
and don't cry for me
but smile that i understand
my own truth.

A Rainy Tuesday Morning

Plans

Lets abort this plan.
And forget the map.
To wander around.
No compass.
No goals.
See the concrete
As a mountains of man.
Resting on shores of the ocean.
To see life as actions.
Instead of results.

----------------------

I was Young once.

When I was young.
I built.
Wooden towers.
They soared from the carpet
And would tumble down.
To see another rebuilt.
Boredom always won.
Now I look around.
And only see grown children
In concrete towers.

When I was young.
I napped.
So today I closed my eyes.
And pulled the blanket close.
To awake. 30 minutes later
and find the world again.
clean and polished
sparkling in the afternoon sun.
Tomorrow I will nap.
Like I was young.

---------------------

The New Age

I plugged in.
Logged on.
Sped through the world.
To find hidden spots.
Across an ocean.
Or just a room.
Weaving round corners
To find the faces
of friends and family.
To speak with no voice
to stay here forever.

Idle times for idle minds

Night Terrors/The Bizarreness of life.

I had a dream
that would not leave.
Of what I loved
and what I lost.
I cried through the night
so said to find joy.

And a quote.
"There are no exceptions, just unknown variables"

And something tapped directly from the mind:

Sometimes I can't take life.
I get depressed like the rest of us.
But then.
I take a cigarette.
And let it guide my path through the night.
Finding hidden holes in murky alleys.
No where is there love.
No where is there hope.
But everything is at peace.
And so I let the burnt end drop.
To mark where there is nothing.
Taking solace in the solitude.
And life resumes.

Sunday Slumbers.

The white whistling winds wrap the world,
tucking it into morning bed
as the shade gains ground
and the temperature tumbles
I freeze i wonder as i watch the world
the constant motion coming to an end
on a lazy sunday slumber everything sleeps

Yawn

Mother

its all falling apart
grey buildings to dust
faded vibrance slipping
into the drain
as the concrete walls
break apart
the green things show up
planted inside the dead
the still beating heart
of mother pumps
life back into our death
and green spreads to red
and yellow
and blue.

----------

Symphonics

were all just a note
slow vibrations
to make up the music
of this screaming symphony
but i want to be accented
to fly above the others
perfectly in tune
but above it all
for just a moment
before i fade back into the song
that will never end.

A roll?

Shaken

the world had shaken
or atleast mine
when it collapsed
land disappeared
and river reappeared
they sank in tin coffins
but
hope didn't fall
as people plunged
so did others
to bring help
to bring life
they forgot the risks
and though a bridge had crumpled
hope had been replenished

--------

Forests

I walked
where it felt no one had
where trees were scary
and animals unpredictable
the sun was fierce
and the wind even worse
then i sat
and became it
because i had stopped
trying to make an order
a place for the moss
and it grew over me
and i became it
when i had to leave
it came with me
and never left

------

We Walked

i've given up
with no hope
the sun burned
and the shade froze
no one would stop
but you did
and i stood up with you
and we talked
you didn't worry my wounds
we talked
of life
of light
darkness even
and though nothing was changed
it was all different

Lots. .

Red Cheeks

i saw your red cheeks
puffing as you ran
unable to breathe
from exertion
but it was beautiful
to see so much hope
unbound
and giving
a world had scarred
but you still ran
with the hope of finding
and holding that love
with your cheeks still red


------------------


Try

i tried
and one day it caught
and the gears fell in place
the machine turned on
and i felt its joy
as it leapt to please
to bring about the hope
i had fought
so many battles
to try to find this moment
and i tried
and it caught
and i will never forget
i tried

-------

Beat

feel it
deep within you
that simple beat
of life
thought it falls silent
the ones it bounced with
wont be silent
and the drums wont stop
but even they cant drown
out your own rhythm
that you gave
for the world
because its all you had

The Begings (Part 1 of an unkown amount)

And there they sat
in mist filled rooms
with sketched plans
for an ugly war
and spaghetti wires
to start burning play-dough
ashes still swish in the air
with minds unfocused
trying to burn the world
that had gave them hope
to burn the sky

the windows cracked by sunlight
as the last lines were drawn
the paper left fractured
in a precursor to the world
with belts strapped tight
and coats drawn close
they left into the blinding light
men with a mission
but only a little hope
to break the concrete
and to setup theory

bound and gagged

you took my arms
and tied them against me
you took my feet
and bound them together
bound and gagged
in your church basement
bound and gagged
in lit coffins

the air was poisoned
by your last thoughts
the air was stolen
by all your parts
blinded and left
to fight for myself
blinded and left
to give up and turn in

so many lives were stolen
through false leaders
hopes burned down
through fear and corruption
i can free myself
and leave the rest
bound and gagged

Life

i could be you
it wouldn't be too hard
switch around the bodies
and were all the same

life was never coherent
and i haven't caught my breath
but every curve brings surprises
good and bad, its all the same

its not that i don't care
its i can't stop caring
love and hate are all passion
flames stoked high breed heat

my love
and your hate are the same flower
but mine spreads on the wind
and yours die in the sun

were all made of the same parts
and this is all so confusing
so love everything
and give everything

Free are Home

the free are home
the free are home
brought on soldiers backs
and tank treads
the free are home
the free are home
seized by bullet holes
sunk by wandering
the free are home
the free are home
and we left them to dry
no blood on our floors

the free are home
and the walls are on fire
the free are home
and the floors have sunk
the free are home
and they will still wander
the free are home
and i'm sick of their crying

we let them go out
and now we forgot

Flower

have this flower
that i plucked in your garden
it out shown the sun
but its grown dim
in your hand

it grew for you
as i lived for you
and like the sun
you have bathed me

pleasure was your name
and you never let me forget
just like the sun
you can never set
but only bounce back

Hope

I never lost my hope
in the world i love
i never lost my love
for a world with hope
the designs that i found
left smiles on my face
and the sadness in the air
never took up much space
my enemies can be friends
if i just give them the chance
my enemies can hold the key
if i just hold promises dear
even left beat and dead
light will still shine
left used until nothings left
hope will still fill
and i'll hold onto my hope
so i can never lose my love